The Sandwich Generation: Caught Between Two Worlds
by Lisa Peri, MSW
I started the Annapolis Moms Facebook Group when I moved back to Annapolis from Los Angeles, 14 years ago. I was 40 years old and my children were 4 and 6. Today, my children are 19 and 21 and are going to community college while living at home. My parents are now 80 and 84 and need a lot of help. I now find myself helping my children navigate life while I’m helping my parents find in-home care, doing last-minute medication runs, and assisting with grocery shopping. I am part of the “sandwich generation,” and I am not alone. The “sandwich generation” faces unique challenges that can feel overwhelming, exhausting, and emotionally draining. In the United States, this generation exists because people are living longer, having children later, and facing economic pressures that require them to juggle multiple caregiving roles. In today’s fast-paced and demanding world, a significant portion of us Annapolis Moms find ourselves squeezed between two equally weighty responsibilities: raising our children while also caring for our aging parents. The balancing act of managing two generations’ needs, often while working full-time jobs and maintaining households, can create an ongoing struggle with time, energy, and financial resources. For many of us, the pressures of raising our children are already substantial. Parenting involves guiding, nurturing, and supporting children as they grow into adults. From helping with school assignments and extracurricular activities to navigating social issues and health concerns, we must be present and engaged. Yet, for those of us in the sandwich generation, these responsibilities are compounded by the additional and often unexpected duties of caring for our aging parents. Caring for our elderly family members can range from managing their medical appointments, medications, and finances to providing emotional support and, in some cases, round-the-clock care. Many aging parents face health issues such as dementia, mobility challenges, or
chronic illnesses that require constant attention. This caregiving often brings emotional challenges, as we witness our parents’ health decline, coupled with the strain of making difficult decisions about care options, living arrangements, and finances. For many, the financial burden is another significant challenge for the sandwich generation, supporting their children through college or preparing for major expenses like weddings or first homes, while simultaneously facing the high costs of elder care. Nursing homes, assisted living, home health aides, and medical expenses can quickly drain savings, forcing families to make difficult sacrifices. Time is perhaps the most precious commodity, and for the sandwich generation, there never seems to be enough of it. Balancing a demanding career, helping with school activities, attending medical appointments for aging parents, and maintaining a household often means personal time and self-care are pushed to the bottom of the priority list. This can lead to burnout, chronic stress, and even physical health issues like hypertension or insomnia. Many in the sandwich generation also report feelings of guilt— guilt over not spending enough time with their children, not providing enough care for their parents, or not dedicating enough energy to their own well-being. Despite these struggles, the sandwich generation also finds moments of joy and fulfillment. Many in our group describe the sense of purpose they feel in helping their parents and guiding their children, and the deep connections they foster with both generations. They develop resilience, empathy, and strength through their caregiving roles, often learning invaluable lessons about family, love, and perseverance. Personally, I love helping my parents. They gave me so much growing up, and while it’s an honor to give back, it’s also a lot of work—and finding good resources isn’t always easy. Since many Annapolis Moms are part of the sandwich generation, we created a local directory of vetted Thumbs Up businesses we trust to support us on this journey.
JULY 2025 | 53
Powered by FlippingBook